a life lesson from a libra (and their aries partner)

before i move onto the stuff you actually signed up for, I need to share some exciting news:

i will be featured as one of the speakers for the next queer astrology conference, feb 4 2023, starting at 2 pm eastern US time. please join me by registering for it at queerastrology.com x

for those who aren’t aware: i am in a loving relationship with an aries sun. i have a libra sun, out of sect. opposites attract, or so they say.

they are the axis of “me vs we”

when we speak of dignity: aries suns are exalted, while libra suns are fallen and lack the proper environment and resourcing they need to shine in their respective spaces. the sun is a source of vitality, life and energy— it makes sense that a fiery ball of ego appears to be exalted!

aries is the baby of the zodiac, rushing into everything with the unbridled vigour. to clients, i liken aries to a baby holding a weapon and wobbling into war in an attempt to charge forward. it makes for cute and endearing imagery, but a baby shouldn’t have access to all that weaponry. aries placements are the id of the zodiac. not in a bad way, but as a reminder that sometimes our baser instincts need some refinement and discretion. we cannot always rush into situations with the pure adrenaline and militarism like a martian does.

the venusian counterpart in the axis, libra, tends to avoid the spotlight because they’re too busy doting on their other relationships to ever really be seen. as someone who is a leo rising, with a libra sun as their ascendant ruler— this is fucking difficult to deal with. part of me yearns for the warmth of the sun, to be acknowledged for my achievements; but my fallen sun cringes at the thought of taking up too much space. when explaining why and how a fallen sun works out, i generally tell clients that librans have a tendency to rope other people into the light with them, and unintentionally putting the focus on them. instead of sharing the light, libra tends to step into the background, and refocus the spot on their collaborators and downplay their achievements.

doesn’t libra deserve time to shine? 

it’s a lesson that i’ve had to continually learn— especially when in relation to my aries sun partner. while he is shy (thank his cancer ascendant,) he often possesses a quiet confidence that i have yet to match. i have a tendency to apologise for taking up space, and roping my friends and loved ones into the mess in order to divvy up the focus. instead of casting the beam onto others and taking the role of the sun shining down on others, he’s taught me, instead, to warm myself up in those beautiful rays; to become gracious and accept the radiance and to bask in it.

perhaps it’s due to my intersectional identities and the fact that most of American society would rather see me unalive: but the space i take up is just as valid as any cishet white American man’s right to it (honestly, maybe even more so?) the libran fear of taking up space because it may harm our 1:1 partnerships is a real one. often, we are known for being the people pleasers of the zodiac. taking it a step further, there is always slander or teasing when it comes to not truly knowing a libra’s real identity— maybe it’s because we don’t always know what we’re like either. in an attempt to honour our relations, we tend to shrink our actual selves down to size and bring out the qualities that our loved ones project onto us, or that we’ve determined to be the best ways to exist around them.

however, the opposition (aries) teaches us to live wholly as ourselves, and unapologetically. who else would butt their way, horns first, into battle without nary a thought because it felt right to them? aries. that’s who. existing as one’s true self is one of the bravest things a person can do.

i will most likely write more about oppositions, how they relate to relationships and more lessons about existing in good relation to one another.

for now, this is what mercury said i needed to get out and i did :) please remember to check out this weekend’s conference, featuring me and a whole host of other QTBIPOC speakers. you will get the recordings of all featured speakers for life. if you’re waiting for *me* to put something up, i will eventually post my recorded lecture up for purchase on my website.